I’VE BEEN EXPECTING YOU.
Come this way...
Good evening. Welcome to another wailing weekly newsletter creeping and crawling with the infestation of cult film knowledge. It’s the mutilating month of October. A month of ghouls, witches, banshees and Death. A month when the demons of Hell are set loose to feast on the fear of the living. It is only fitting that during such an exceptional time of year when the moon is the full but the crypts are empty that I step into the newsletter spotlight. It is I, Count Kyle-ula. Quake in fear oh helpless mortal as I rise from the depths of my torturous tomb to spread the news of Cult Labs like a disease burning and burying deep inside your un-saveable soul. You may grab your crucifix, your clove of garlic, your silver steak and your thumping heart as it beats against your ribcage in a desperate plea to flea in despair and fear. You may do all these things, but neither will help you. So, step into my laboratory, guzzle down a potent mixture of puppy dog tails, embryo juice and the essence of shock as I drag you screaming by the nerves through the Cult Labs Crypt of Cavernous Terror.
Igor, quit playing with your organ!
ALL THE BEST THINGS OUT NOW!
Arrowdrome's Battle Royale has landed!
The hounds of Hell are howling in this October night. But they’re not on the lookout for human flesh to sink their chops into. Oh no. These beasts of the underworld are screaming in delight at the epic awesomeness of this week’s DVD releases. Look up! The sky above has torn in twain as a large blue object soars towards this meesly planet. The alien entity splits itself apart, landing neatly on shop shelves all over the UK. Rectangle in shape and covered in a very fetching blue and black design, it can only be one thing. The collosal Arrowdrome Sci-Fi label has landed! Up first is the all time Asian classic, Battle Royale. An undeniable classic, bubbling and boiling over with twists, gore, action, murder and tension. This truly is an incredible film. Arrowdrome’s Battle Royale is planning on invading all homes (with good film taste!) – don’t hesitate! Grab this sweet baby now! Head to the official section on the forum to discuss this release or head to this blog to find out the DVD’s specs!
Bursting out on the Arrowdrome Horror label comes perhaps one of the greatest trilogies ever filmed, not just in the horror genre. Ladies and gentlemen, please put your claws together for that Daddy of the Undead, Mr. George Andew Romero! Arrowdrome have unleashed the beast that is his original Dead trilogy in a gore-geous boxset (featuring the God of flesh-eating zombie films, Night Of The Living Dead, Dawn Of The Dead and Day Of The Dead!). Complete with booklet, featurettes and 2 audio commentaries, this is a must have for any zombie fan or horror fan new to the likes of Romero. Visit the mini-forum for this fantastic release now for all the info and a chance to vote for your favourite of the three Deads. Or, if you’d prefer to buy Arrowdrome’s release of Dawn of the Dead and Day Of The Dead seperatly, then look no further than this and that link!
Oh yeah!
Finally, this week has also seen the release of the giallo classic Bay Of Blood. Directed by one of the greatest directors ever to have graced the horror genre, Mario Bava, comes this blueprint to the slasher film. This one’s perhaps one of the most extra heavy Arrowdrome releases with such special features as interviews with Joe Dante, the cameraman Gianlorenzo Battaglia, a commentary by the Bava-buff Tim Lucas, radio spots and a commentary of the trailer by Edgar Shaun Of The Dead Wright and of course that ever important reversible artwork and booklet. Head along to the sub-forum now for the ins and outs.
STRANGL E THE CLOWN’S KILLER JOKE OF THE WEEK!
Smile, Kiddies!
Honk! Honk! Meet this month’s very special guest, Strangle the Clown with a joke of the week. If it doesn’t split your sides, he sure will.
Why did the cyclops teacher leave school early?
He only had one pupil.
No laughter?! Jeez, this audience really is dead (and rotting)!
Sluuuurp. Oh, excuse me readers, I got a little hungry. Nothing quite like human brains sucked from the skull to quech the nibbles, my uncle Fester used to say. Anyway…
COMING SOON TO A SHOP NEAR YOU…
“Hubble bubble, toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble. Eye of newt, wing of bat, lets take a look at whats out soon and shizzle and that…” – William Shakespeare.
Their cages are rattling and their hinges are buckling. Soon, very soon, these monster releases will break loose, burst out, and unleash themselves on the world. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Here’s a guide to those beastly releases hurtling your way in the not too distant future.
- Shuffling in from the underworld comes the new zombie film that guarantees to fill you with terror as it heads straight for your pulsing juggular. Anchor Bay’s The Dead is set for release on the 14th October and, for those not in the know, is quite simply one of the best zombie films of the recent sonambulist boom. Set in the scenic beauty of Africa (complete with real dead bodies on the street!), this film features some of the greatest scenes ever shot of the living dead and goes all old-school with its slower-than-slow zombies. Check it out! Visit the fanhub here or take a look at Sam’s blog!
-
When a film starts with a rape joke, you know your in for a good time.
Taking a break from all this horror, Arrow Video are releasing Terry Jones Cult Comedy film, Erik The Viking on the 14th October too. Staring Tim Robbins as Erik, Tim McInnery (speaking of, anyone heard about the news regarding bringing back Blackadder? Sounds promising!) and staring those Monty Python hero’s John Cleese and Terry Jones, this is a great slice of British comedy at its finest! Visit the sub forum here for the low down, discuss Python to your hearts content here and have a sneak preview of the film right about here!
- Right, back to the horror! Arrowdrome have also got a rather obscure little european release up their sleeves with the Devils Kiss release. If you’ve seen this, or are intersted in seeing something a little less known and totally bananas then head over the sub-forum here for all the info you need.
- Also out soon comes Studio Canel’s release of that classic sci-fi horror The Quatermass And The Pit! One of the greatest films ever created by the Hammer Studios, this is an unforgetable film that will have you on the edge of your seat throughout. Come on over to the forum for all the info and cookies.*
- Then of course there’s the little matter of a certain yellow box set that’s broken free from it’s Hellish chains to corrupt the youth and turn us all into psychopathic murdering freaks (if the 1980′s Daily Mail is anything to go by, of course). Yes, my dear minions, Shameless Screen Entertainment’s impending release date of the Slasher Nasties box set is upon us. Containing three semi-nasty, semi-slashers (Hey! It’s exploitation! What do you expect?!) Torso, Killer Nun and the recently watched at the Cult Labs Film Night Night Train Murders. Nuff said, just look how awesome this thing is! Click the picture and it’ll tranform you magically to the sub-forum. Amazing!
All Hail The VHS Box Set!
WIN! WIN! WIN! BECAUSE WE’RE GENEROUS LIKE THAT.
Who wants to get their grubby mits on some awesome prizes? Everyone! Well, first off a big huge congratulations to Aidenphantom, Baseball Fury and The Blob who each won the Cat O’Nine Tails blu-ray after a 50 page long game of 20 Questions! More congratulations go to Baseball Fury (twice?! Lucky you!) and Drugula for winning the latest Twilight Zone box set!
But enough with the congratulations! Lets skip to some competitions that are running at the moment!
-
Weekly Comp – Pick Your Own Arrowdrome! Let’s face it, there’s a lot of Arrowdrome titles coming out soon (or now). And also, let’s face it, Count Kyle-ula is very busy eating the flesh of victims, reanimating corpses and generally doing evil stuff. So, you can pick your own prize this week. Go for it! All you need to do is guess the 10 film titles. Simple? Not so much. This ends on Sunday 9th October.
- Super Comp – Nerdoh T-Shirts! Now this is one freakin’ awesome prize! We’ve teamed up with www.nerdoh.co.uk to bring you this super Super Comp! Three people will each win themselves ANY t-shirt of their choosing from the website and what’s more EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. who enters will automatically get 10% off their next purchase! How cool is that?! Enter today! This one ends on the 9th October aswell, so you better hurry!
Enter away! Here’s a little bit of news that may get you excited…or not. This past week I have had an influx of emails asking to run competitions for them, so expect quite a few Super Comps soon with some very VERY cool prizes and discounts up for grabs! I’ve said too much already!
Click me!
So that’s all for this week.Oh and before I go….
There are so many ways you can get involved with all the cult film fun at Cult Labs:
o Join in the debate on the forums.
o Sign up to the newsletter (if you haven’t already!).
o Read the blog.
o Join us on Facebook.
o Follow us on Twitter.
o Check us out on MySpace.
Now off into the night I must fly, the moon is high tonight. If you have any questions for me, just let me know. I’m always on the forum, if not you can find me hiding in your closet or under your bed. Scary stuff!
*No cookies included!
