Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace (1999) ★★
For the most part, it's badly written, meandering and boring, and Jar Jar Binks is a horrendous character, grating and borderline offensive.
However, the pod race is genuinely engaging and the sequence with Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi taking on Darth Maul is really well edited and superbly scored.
It's not a terrible film, but it's not close to being mediocre either.
Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones (2002) ★
A ponderous and dull film without any interesting dialogue, a romantic subplot without any romance, wooden performances from Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman, a supporting character (C-3PO) who is nearly as irritating as Jar Jar Binks, and dated CGI.
I did laugh when Christopher Lee's Count Dooku escaped across the desert on a speeder and looked like someone had photoshopped an old man on a mobility scooter.
Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith (2005) ★★½
Of the films in the Star Wars prequel trilogy, Revenge of the Sith was too late and too mediocre. Some films are made mediocre, some films achieve mediocrity, and some films have mediocrity thrust upon them. With Revenge of the Sith it had been all three. Even amongst films lacking in distinction it stood out as lacking more distinction than all the rest, and people who watched it were always impressed by how unimpressive it was. (With apologies to Joseph Heller.)
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