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Coming in Jan 2021 to Big Finish. Masterful - an 8 disc audio adventure starring Michelle Gomez, Geoffrey Beevers, Mark Gatiss, Derek Jacobi, Alex MacQueen, Milo Parker, Eric Roberts and in his BF debut, John Simm. |
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Doctor Who over the years: Episode quotes The Doctor FallsThe Master: So, I imagine you're the next one along, then? Missy: Oh, I think so. I'm a bit hazy on the whole regeneration thing, I'm afraid. The Master: You mean, I'm going to turn into a woman and you don't even remember it happening? Missy: Oh! Am I a woman now? The Master: Well, kind of, yeah. ************************************************** Bill: People are always going to be afraid of me, aren't they? Aren't they? (The Doctor wipes a tear from her Cyber-face.) What is that, engine oil? The Doctor: No. It's an actual tear. But it shouldn't be. The Master: Doctor. Right, while you've been here chatting up Robo-Mop, me and me have been busy. We've found it. (Razor) Oh, hello, my dear. My God, you were so boring for all those years. But it was worth every day of it, for this. The Doctor: Bill, don't let him upset you. The Master: Though, didn't you used to be a woman? I'm going to be a woman, fairly soon. Any tips? Or, maybe, I dunno, old bras? Cyber-Bill: I am not upset. The Master: Oh. Well, doesn't that take all the fun out of cruelty. Might as well rile a fridge. Come on, this way. (But inside, Bill is crying.) ************************************************** The Master: I landed here. I had trouble taking off. Missy: The black hole? The Master: Too close to the event horizon. Missy: And you screwed up. You went too fast. The Master: I blew the dematerialisation circuit. Missy: Which reminds me. A funny thing happened to me once. The Master: What? (She grabs his lapels and pushes him against a pillar.) Missy: A very long time ago, a very scary lady threw me against a wall and made me promise to always, always carry a spare dematerialisation circuit. I don't remember much about her now but, she must have made quite an impression. (And takes a dematerialisation circuit out of her jacket pocket.) The Master: You know you basically have me to thank for this. Missy: You're welcome. The Master: By the way, is it wrong that I er (glances down toward his crotch) Missy: (taking a step away )Yes. Very. ************************************************** (The Master calls a lift. It is empty.) The Master: Right. Come on, then, hop in. Straight down. Tardis. Missy: Come here. The Master: I'm sorry? (She plants her parasol in the ground.) Missy: Come here, I said. The Master: Seriously? Are we really going to do this? (He embraces her.) Missy: I loved being you. Every second of it. Oh, the way you burn like a sun. Like a whole screaming world on fire. I remember that feeling, and I always will. And I will always miss it. The Master: Now that was really very nicely done. Missy: Thank you. (He has blood on his fingers and she has a stiletto blade) The Master: It's good to know I haven't lost my touch. Missy: You deserve my best. ************************************************** The Master: How long do I have? Missy: Oh, I was precise. You'll be able to make it back to your Tardis, maybe even get a cuppa, although you might leak a little. The Master: And then regenerate into you. Missy: Welcome to the sisterhood. The Master: Missy? Seriously, why? Missy: Oh, because he's right. Because it's time to stand with him. It's where we've always been going, and it's happening now, today. It's time to stand with the Doctor. The Master: No. Never. Missy! I will never stand with the Doctor! Missy: Yes, my dear, you will. (So the Master zaps her in the back with his triple barrelled sonic whatever.) The Master: Don't bother trying to regenerate. You got the full blast. (They both laugh.) You see, Missy, this is where we've always been going. This is our perfect ending. We shoot ourselves in the back. ************************************************* The Doctor: Telos! Sealed you into your ice tombs! Voga! Canary Wharf! Planet 14! Every single time, you lose. Even on the Moon. (He gets zapped in the back by an early-style Cyberman.) Ah! Hello. I'm the Doctor. Cyberman: Doctors are not required. (It aims its helmet weapon directly at his chest.) The Doctor: Argh! No, no. I'm not a doctor. I am the Doctor. The original, you might say. (It blasts him again. He falls to his knees. The regeneration energy builds in his hand.) Doctor. Doctor, let it go. Time enough. (He raises the sonic screwdriver and detonates a massive explosion. He lies amidst fires, watched by a weeping brown eye.) Pity. No stars. I hoped there'd be stars. ************************************************** * The Doctor: Sontarans perverting the course of human history! I don't want to go. When the Doctor, when the Doctor was me. When the Doctor was me. It's starting. I'm regenerating. No! No! No! No! No! No! (The regeneration stops, and the Tardis has materialised.) Where have you taken me? If you're trying to make a point, I'm not listening. I don't want to change again. Never again! I can't keep on being somebody else. Wherever it is, I'm staying. (He runs outside into a snowstorm, and the Cloister Bell sounds.) No! (He plunges his hands into the snow with a sizzle. The regeneration stops again.) I will not change. 1st Doctor: I will not change. I will not! No, no, no, no. The whole thing's ridiculous. The Doctor: Hello? Is someone there? 1st Doctor: Who is that? The Doctor: I'm the Doctor. (The elderly figure in checked trousers, cape, scarf and astrakhan hat comes into view.) 1st Doctor: The Doctor. Oh, I don't think so. No, dear me, no. You may be a doctor, but I am the Doctor. The original, you might say.
__________________ People try to put us down Just because we get around Golly, Gee! it's wrong to be so guilty |
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Doctor Who over the years: Episode quotes Twice Upon A TimeCaptain: Hello? Sorry. So sorry. I don't suppose either of you is a doctor? The Doctor: Are you trying to be funny? ************************************************** 1st Doctor: But you might be in for a sur... My Tardis. Look at my Tardis! Captain: This is impossible! 1st Doctor: Have I been burgled? Captain: It's... but it's... 1st Doctor: It's hideous! (Continuing that splendid tradition of Doctors hating each others taste in interiors.) Captain: Bigger on the inside than it is on the outside. The Doctor: You know, I thought it probably was. I'm glad it's not just me. (Shuts the doors behind him.) Captain: What is this place? 1st Doctor: This place is, or ought to be, my Tardis. (The Doctor swings the scanner round.) The Doctor: Technically, that is your Tardis. It's about seventy feet that way, see? Always remember where you parked. It's going to come up a lot. Captain: Is this madness? Am I going mad? The Doctor: Madness? Well, you're an officer from World War One at the South Pole, being pursued by an alien through frozen time. Madness was never this good. Captain: World War One? The Doctor: Judging by the uniform, yes. Captain: Yes, but what do you mean, one? The Doctor: Oh, sorry. Spoilers. ************************************************** Captain: Who are you people? 1st Doctor: I am the Doctor, and this is my The Doctor: It's complicated. Actually, I am also 1st Doctor: My nurse. The Doctor: Excuse me? 1st Doctor: I realise that seems a little improbable. The Doctor: Well, yes. 1st Doctor: Because he's a man. The Doctor: What? 1st Doctor: Older gentlemen, like women, can be put to use. The Doctor: You can't, you, you, you can't say things like that. 1st Doctor: Can't I? Says who? The Doctor: Just about everyone you're going to meet for the rest of your life. ************************************************** 1st Doctor: What's wrong with the lights? The Doctor: It's supposed to be like this. 1st Doctor: Why? The Doctor: It, it's atmospheric. 1st Doctor: Atmospheric? This is the flight deck of the most powerful space-time machine in the known universe, not a restaurant for the French. Good Lord, what is that? (Rushing down the steps to his electric guitar.) The Doctor: Oh, look what someone has accidentally left here. Captain: I say, it's some sort of guitar, isn't it? The Doctor: Oh, is it yours? Captain: No. 1st Doctor: It appears to have been played quite recently. It's the only thing here that's been cleaned. Yes, in fact this whole place could do with a good dusting. Obviously Polly isn't around any more. The Doctor: Please, please. Please stop saying things like that. ************************************************** Bill: You think I'm a duplicate, a trick. The Doctor: I don't know what I think. But if there's the slightest chance that Bill Potts is alive and standing in front of me, then I will not, under any circumstances, put her life in danger again. Bill: Seriously. You're looking right at me and you don't even know I'm here. The Doctor: Correct. I ask you to respect that, and respect me. Bill: You're an arse. Do you know that? You, you, you, you're a stupid bloody arse. The Doctor: As I have always respected you. (The first Doctor opens the Tardis door and looks at Bill.) 1st Doctor: If I hear any more language like that from you, young lady, you're in for a jolly good smacked bottom. (And goes back inside.) The Doctor: Can we just pretend that that never happened? Bill: I'm a broad-minded girl. I mean, I know we have this whole professor - student thing going on. The Doctor: Can we just never, ever talk about this again? Bill: I hope we talk about it loads. I hope we spend years laughing about it. Come back alive. The Doctor: Be here when I do. ************************************************** Captain: Thank you. Thank you all. You've all been most gracious in the unfortunate circumstances. 1st Doctor: I regret, Captain, that the universe generally fails to be a fairy tale. Glass Woman: When time resumes, you will not remember this. A perception filter will also render us invisible. Captain: Yes. One imagines some of those words were attached to actual meanings of some sort. One thing you could possibly do for me, if you were very kind? The Doctor: Oh, anything. Name it. Captain: My family. Perhaps you could look in on them, from time to time? 1st Doctor: We should be delighted. What's the name? Captain: Lethbridge-Stewart. Captain Archibald Hamish Lethbridge-Stewart. 1st Doctor: I shall make it my business. The Doctor: You can trust him on that. ************************************************** The Doctor: Oh, there it is. The silly old universe. The more I save it, the more it needs saving. It's a treadmill. (The Tardis beeps, flashes and burbles at him.) Yes, yes, I know. They'll get it all wrong without me. I suppose one more lifetime wouldn't kill anyone. Well, except me. (The Cloister Bell tolls.) You wait a moment, Doctor. Let's get it right. I've got a few things to say to you. Basic stuff first. Never be cruel, never be cowardly, and never, ever eat pears! Remember, hate is always foolish. and love is always wise. Always try to be nice, but never fail to be kind. Oh, and you mustn't tell anyone your name. No one would understand it, anyway. Except, ah! (collapses) Except children. Children can hear it sometimes. If their hearts are in the right place, and the stars are too, children can hear your name. Argh! But nobody else. Nobody else, ever. Laugh hard, run fast, be kind. Doctor, I let you go. (The regeneration streams out of him, causing Tardis systems to go bang. When it ends, the engines are stuttering, and the signet ring falls off the Doctor's right hand. In fact, all the clothes are rather baggy on this new body. The scanner reveals the reflection of the new, younger face with jaw-length blonde hair.) Doctor 13: Oh, brilliant! (The accent has moved southwards, from Scotland to Northern England. She presses a button, there's a small explosion in the console and the scanner proclaims - Systems Crisis MULTIPLE OPERATIONS FAILURES. The Tardis snaps back into normal space, tilts drastically and keeps going bang. The Cloister Bell continues to toll. The Doctor tries to hang on to the console, but loses her grip and slides towards the door which is now open with papers flying out of it. Now the Tardis is completely on its side, door open downwards. The Time Rotor explodes and she falls out towards the distant ground as the Tardis, its interior in flames, vanishes.)
__________________ People try to put us down Just because we get around Golly, Gee! it's wrong to be so guilty |
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Image of the Day # 253 The Abominable Snowmen (1967) saw Jack Watling (Professor Travers) on screen with his daughter Deborah (Victoria), seen here with Frazer Hines who played fellow companion Jamie. They would share the screen again the following year for The Web of Fear. |
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Doctor Who over the years: Episode quotes The Woman Who Fell To Earth(Gazing at the blue thing.) Yasmin: And you say you just found it here? Ryan: No, I said it appeared, out of nowhere. Yasmin: Right. Ryan: I swear, this isn't a prank. I came down here to get me bike. Yasmin: And where's your bike? Ryan: In that tree. ************************************************** Graham: Grace, get back. (An interconnecting door is blown apart. A multi-tentacled thing moves slowly towards them.) What is it? Grace: I've no idea. (Electrical discharges from the thing trap them against the final and locked door. Suddenly, someone falls through the carriage roof with a cry.) The Doctor: What? (They point at the being behind her. She grabs a dangling electrical cable and thrusts it into the thing, which stop sparking.) Should buy us a few seconds. (looks at the hole in the roof) Oh yeah, Long story. Tell you later. Doors? Grace: Locked shut. The Doctor: We'll see about that. No sonic. Empty pockets. Oh, I hate empty pockets. ************************************************** The Doctor: You three, relax, but stay put. I'll check the rest of the train. Fat lot of use you two were. (Walking through the train.) Yasmin: Hey! Hold on there please, madam. I need you to do as I say. This could be a potential crime scene. The Doctor: Why are you calling me madam? Yasmin: Because you're a woman. The Doctor: Am I? Does it suit me? Yasmin: What? The Doctor: Oh yeah, I remember. Sorry, half an hour ago I was a white-haired Scotsman ************************************************** Yasmin: Wait. Can you stop, please? This could be a major incident. I'm the one in charge here. The Doctor: What are you going to do? Yasmin: Call it in to my station. The Doctor: What are you going to tell them? Yasmin: The facts. The Doctor: Which are? Yasmin: The train was attacked. The Doctor: By what? Yasmin: I need to take a look at CCTV footage. The Doctor: And why do you need to check CCTV when we all saw it with our own eyes? Ryan: Was it an alien? Because it looked like an alien to me. Yasmin: Oh, come on. The Doctor: What, you think he's wrong? Yasmin: No, I dunno, but... The Doctor: But you're worried about how you'll explain all this to a superior officer who won't believe you. Yasmin: I can't not report it. The Doctor: You could hold off until we get the answers to the bigger questions. Yasmin: Which are? The Doctor: What was it? Why is it here? Where's it going next? And, most importantly, how do we stop it? 'Cos whatever it is, I don't think it's done. Come on, Ryan. Come on, Yaz. I'm calling you Yaz, cos we're friends now. ************************************************** Ryan: Did you just make that? The Doctor: Sonic screwdriver. Well, I say screwdriver, but it's a bit more multi-purpose than that. Scanner, diagnostics, tin opener. More of a sonic Swiss Army knife. Only without the knife. Only idiots carry knives. ************************************************** Tzim-Sha: You're interfering in things you don't understand. The Doctor: Yeah, well, we all need a hobby. Tzim-Sha: You're not human. Who are you? The Doctor: Me? I'm... Oh, it's gone again. I had it a minute ago. So annoying. Same question back at you. No, in fact, before that, because it's really bugging me, actually not bugging me, offending me. Why the teeth? Bad enough you kill, why take a tooth from the victim? (It removes its faceplate to reveal that its head is studded with teeth.) Tzim-Sha: A Stenza warrior wears his conquests. You may tell your children you were once privileged to encounter Tzim-Sha of the Stenza. The Doctor: Tim Shaw? Tzim-Sha: Tzim-Sha. The Doctor: Tim Shaw. Tzim-Sha: Tzim-Sha! Soon to be leader of the Stenza warrior race, conquerors of the Nine Systems. The Doctor: When you say soon to be leader, what are you now, the office junior? Graham: Eh? No, don't wind him up. ************************************************** The Doctor: That tentacle-y thing is guarding Karl's crane, so we go up this one. Yasmin: What do we do when we get up there? The Doctor: Don't worry, I've got a plan. Yasmin: Really? The Doctor: Well, I will have by the time we get to the top. ************************************************** The Doctor: I'm just a traveller. Sometimes I see things need fixing, I do what I can. Except right now, I'm a traveller without a ship. I've stayed too long. I should get back to finding my Tardis. Yasmin: Doctor. Can I just say, you really need to get out of those clothes. The Doctor: Right, yeah. It's been a long time since I bought women's clothes. ************************************************** (The Doctor is putting the final touches to a very Heath-Robinson lash-up. Graham is clutching a car battery.) Graham: How long have we got to stand here for? I'm getting cramp. The Doctor: Seriously, Graham, trying to concentrate here. Ryan: Do you understand what she's doing? The Doctor: My ship uses a particular type of energy. I've tracked that energy trail from the moment I lost it to where it is now. Now, given this is a transport pod, I'm configuring it to send me to the planet where my ship seems to have ended up. Yasmin: You're going to another planet? The Doctor: Well, trying to. Except Stenza technology's really annoying and super hard to decipher. 139 layers, seven of which don't make sense. Right. Graham. Graham: Yeah? The Doctor: Clamp those onto there. (Crocodile clips onto the battery terminals.) Graham: All right. The Doctor: Yaz, thread the cable onto the top. Ryan, you turn on the switch. Okay, you three, I'm almost gonna miss ya. (A microwave beeps.) That's it. It's connected up. It should work. (She sets the timer on the microwave.) Moment of truth, then. Wish me luck. And goodbye. Oh, deep breath. Not you lot. Me. (She inhales, holds it and activates the Sheffield Sonic. The microwave timer reaches zero, power surges through cables... and they all disappear. The Doctor opens her eyes to find she is floating in the vacuum of space - with her three new companions close by.)
__________________ People try to put us down Just because we get around Golly, Gee! it's wrong to be so guilty |
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