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Last Horror Movie A Serial Killer tapes over part of a Horror Movie to show his crimes whilst explaining why and asking questions of the viewer. This is certainly interesting with the kills being realistically done. I can see myself watching this again but not sure when. In a way I'm surprised this didn't encounter trouble with the BBFC. Cellular Kim Bassinger is kidnapped however she is able to piece back together a Phone in which she is able to phone Chris Evans, who is able to get around Los Angeles and assist her by breaking the law and holding his own against the Kidnappers led by Jason Statham. William H. Macy is the Policeman who assists in a rather enjoyable fast paced effort which doesn't overstay it's welcome. Statham does play a convincing bad guy. Cannonball David Carridine is a Racer who participates in a illegal Road Race where there are dirty tricks aplenty. Done before the Cannonball Run films, this is a more serious effort and whilst not bad, I would watch The Cannonball Run Movies over this. There are Cameos/Early Roles for Sylvester Stallone and Martin Scorsese. |
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COCAINE BEAR – A parachute laden with coke gets hoovered by a national park resident; sylvan antics involving park rangers, babes in the woods and a drug cartel soon follow. I’ve heard a few moans about how it doesn’t really live up to the sheer zap promised by the grabby title, but you know, it’s a film and not a small pile of narcotics. Even though I found the gag-related aspect hit and miss, I quite enjoyed its weird mixture of mawkishness and gore. UNDEFEATABLE – This impeccable travesty of cinema comes from Godfrey Ho. It is well known that many of his films consist of bits of other movies clumsily welded together, but ‘Undefeatable’ seems instead to apply the same process to the most deeply stupid bits of Ho’s own psyche. The result is a mountain of trash that shines like gold. Cynthia Rothrock pulverises goons in denim whilst dark mullet god Don Niam murders anyone who reminds him of his ex-wife... everything else is just the sound of your brain melting. Behold and be blinded by the light that spills from its eye popping, shirt ripping majesty. NIGHT SCREAMS – Since we’re on the subject of Godfrey Ho, ‘Night Screams’ also has a bit of welding going on with it. The edit put out in cinemas, also the main feature on this newish VS blu ray, includes inserts lifted from ‘Graduation Day’ and a couple of random porn flicks. None of said tinkering is as egregious as the handywork a Ho or a Mattei, but it all adds an extra layer of ‘huh?’ to what’s at base a fairly generic slasher; ironically enough, the film’s other eccentricities, from a Nietzsche quoting con-on-the-run to numerous narrative discontinuities and distortions, are already enough to push it somewhere weird. Which is why I liked it. It’s mostly just one long college party garnished with the odd killing, but somehow it tickled me. |
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247°F (2011) Scout Taylor-Compton stars in this thriller about a group of friends who become trapped in the sauna of Tyler Mane's lakeside lodge as the heat steadily rises. A fun little chiller (perhaps not the right word to describe this) with likable enough characters that make you want them to survive. As with yesterday's Altitude this is a film about being trapped in a confined space but this time it's not a plane it's a small room with the temperature rising. Despite it's confines this is a decent enough watch and the fact there's no actual villain of the piece is kind of refreshing as well. |
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INFINITY POOL – Alexander Skarsgard, failed author and frankly a bit of a schmuck, washes up in a White Lotus style resort where Mia Goth sets about luring him into her swinging expat murder gang. The device at the heart of ‘Infinity Pool’ is wonderfully eerie; rich foreigners guilty of awful crimes can pay to be cloned and submit to capital punishment by proxy, the ultimate ‘get out of jail free card’ and springboard of dark desire. As well as obviously being a post-colonialist satire it’s very trippy and at times acutely nightmarish, and I’m personally quite glad I wasn’t on anything stronger than a couple of stellas when I checked it out. Highly recommended, B Cronenberg’s best yet. KISS OF THE TARANTULA – Mid-seventies cheapie about a girl, her pet spiders, and the revenge she exacts upon all the losers who piss her off. Dime-store subplots about brotherly betrayal and small town intrigue keep it rolling, but ‘Kiss Of The Tarantula’ is all about morbid atmosphere. It rises like a pungent mist from scenes of spider-petting, lingering death, and above all the striking musical score, which switches from sinister nursery rhyme twinkle to proto-industrial noise; the soundtrack really goes crazy when those spiders attack. More morbidity flows from the funeral home setting and the constant low-level daddy issues, as well as the sense that all this mayhem takes place within the hazy, dewy-eyed recollections of the film’s spider-loving protagonist. A slight but highly compelling addition to the annals of drive-in era horror, one I always love to dig out. THE INFERNAL RAPIST – With a title like that, it can only really be a toothless timewaster after all… or can it? Nope, full ‘yikes’ are in order, for ‘The Infernal Rapist’ is one grubby ride and a half. Murderer / rapist / bad man Gato is executed in a Mexican pen, only for Satan, resplendent in a sequined catsuit and a massive ostrich feather hat, to appear before him with an offer of reincarnation in exchange for infernal servitude. This amounts all the drugs, money and booze he can handle as long as he constantly rapes and murders “anyone to hand” for her! Our eponymous ‘hero’ shrugs and does what comes naturally… and so cue a whirlwind of nasty sex kills, each more horrid than the last, cheapo laser eye special effects, and sitcom humour set in a beauty salon, where Herr Rapist likes to pop in for the occasional makeover. The many and multiform quirks include a few attempts at nice visual style, with Satan appearing backlit and silhouetted deep in the misty woods, and a strange emphasis on Rapeman forcing people to get high before they die. Utterly bonkers trash, and whatever you may think of it, you can’t dispute its dedication to sleaze. |
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Sound of Freedom, decided to go see this with National Cinema Day for £3, was going to go about 3 times today and see a few films and make use of the deal, but a bit of a family crisis stopped me, anyhow, based on a true story about a guy who rescues kids from traffickers, it was alright nowt special, at times it felt like just a normal film that was a tadge ott, especially when goes into the jungle, it brings home how bad child trafficking is, the storyline was more to do with just saving 2 kids, instead of a storyline about saving kids and bringing the ppl who traffic to justice, but I also felt it fell a bit flat and dull, but also gave the impression that most of the trafficking was US based and not a worldwide problem, the demand is so bad that it's slowly over taking drugs, goes to show you what a sick world we are living in when there must be a lot pedophiles otherwise the demand wouldn't be so high, some ppl have posted on letterboxd about how ppl walked out of the film?? I get the storyline is a touchy subject of kids getting stolen and used as sex objects, and there's a borderline of how far they can go and what can show, but I didn't think it showed too much to be too offensive to be disgusted at making you want to walk out and be shocked by the film, it's ok to watch in your spare time but don't rush to see it.
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Murder Me Monster (2018) An intriguing and weirdly hypnotic Argentinian horror movie in which several women are found headless in a remote region of the Andes. The main suspect, the lover of one of the women, blames the deaths on a mythical creature. Whilst a local cop, also the lover of the victim seems to be the only person who believes the man to be innocent. Although dark writer / director Alejandro Fadel's film is beautiful to look at, so much so it could be a showcase for the quality of Blu-ray with a subtle sound design to match. The pace of the film is languid to say the least but it's well written and nicely acted. There seems to be a connection with the number three and the letter 'M' running throughout the film with even views of the mountains seemingly portraying an M. It's these hints plus the mounting evidence - strange saliva and large misshapen teeth in the necks of the victims that point in the direction of something perhaps Lovecraftian in style which intrigue as well as revolt until we finally get to see the hideous creature in all it's almost pornographic glory. There's no all revealing explanation for events and there doesn't have to be for Murder Me Monster works best as a puzzle with several pieces missing infused with an atmosphere of creeping dread which is evident from the first gruesome scene. |
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Vendetta (2013) A former Special Forces interrogator returns home to find his parents brutally murdered by a street gang, and the police ineffectual. In a race against time he has to hunt down those responsible whilst evading capture from his former unit. An excellent Jonathan Sothcott production utilizing great London location work. Danny Dyer plays his role to perfection and is supported by an impressive line up - Vincent Regan, Alistair Petrie Bruce Payne, Roxanne Mckee with key cameo's from the ever reliable Tony Denham and former Dynasty star Emma Samms. The film is painfully brutal at times and has you rooting for Dyer to wreak his revenge from the off. The film is slickly edited and directed by Stephen Reynolds culminating in an excellent thriller in the Death Wish mould. I'd not watched a film of this ilk in ages and really enjoyed revisiting Sothcott and Dyer's brand of uber-violence even if it is a shade too long at over 100 mins. |
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Dancing at the Blue Iguana (2000) A week in the life of the performers at the Los Angeles strip club, the Blue Iguana. Originally based on an improvised workshop, the film is incredibly natural and realistic. However due to this technique it's also not quite as dramatic as you may wish for with five narratives playing out alongside each other, such as one girl who writes beautiful poetry, another who works as a dominatrix when she's not stripping, another who is desperate for a baby but refuses all the casual sex thrust her way, a fourth girl is having sex with her brother and a fifth, the new girl, simply wants acceptance. At two hours the story is over stretched even though it may seem incredibly busy when seen typed out in a write up, however the actresses who star in the film - Daryl Hannah, Sandra Oh, Jennifer Tilly (The dominatrix, obviously) Kristen Bauer etc - certainly give their all when it comes to the gutsy 'dancing' sequences of which there are several. Dancing at the Blue Iguana is probably a curio due t it's improvisation but all told i rather like it's poignant thought provoking take on life. I'll be watching Daryl Hannah's Strip Notes in the next day or two. A hour long companion piece she made whilst researching for her role as a stripper in the film. |
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Equalizer 3 After getting shot whilst in a Costal Italian Town, Denzel Washington is taken in by the local Doctor as he recuperates. As he gets to know the locals, he finds that a Mafia Group is muscling in and intimidating them with brutal violence, therefore he retaliates in kind while assisting the C.I.A especially Dakota Fanning (Funnily he didn't mention saving a little girl from kidnappers in Mexico LOL). This somehow got a 15 certificate, do not ask me how, it is so violent and TBH, I wasn't expecting much but I was thoroughly entertaining. Other than possibly Superhero Movies and Cartoon Series e.g. Spiderman, has there been a Film Franchise that co-exists with a TV Show with the same title and same sort of stories but has different people playing them? And is this the longest time difference in-between Movies that the same stars have been in (Man On Fire was 2004) Taxi Hunter Antony Wong's Wife dies whilst various Taxi Drivers refuse to help and rip him off therefore starts killing them off. Not sure if this is a CAT III Movie (It's not mentioned on the 88 Films Blu-Ray release) if it is, it's very tame but I enjoyed it. I do wonder if the Filmmaker's had a bad experience with Taxi Driver's beforehand, that's why we got this movie. Quite surprised this hasn't been released in the UK beforehand, as I said, It's pretty tame and certainly have been worse Sexual Assault scenes in Movies. Granted it probably got an 18, but it would have fitted in with either the Tartan, CineAsia or Hong Kong Legends lines. |
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